When We Get Bigger

On death and...

2012-02-23T17:23:00.001-08:00

One thing about cooking in a small space with most of the amenities of a big kitchen is that if something breaks, adjusting can be challenging.

We’ve had a microwave convection oven in our home (that is a very cozy basement for a family of five). I say ‘had’ because it is no longer with us. We’ll probably get another one but the one we have was made in Korea (North maybe?) and the one we want (now at least) is made in Japan.

The first time it broke was 1 week before the warranty ran out. “Usually” the repair isn’t that bad but our gastro-pod (I’ve wanted to use that word for a while now) of a microwave made the repair man’s eyebrows raise (second worst sentence ever written). The second time I called the repair man, he looked into the anatomy and physiology of the last time he repaired it and, after saying it was probably only going to cost $100 (for probably “just a burned out wire or something”), was quiet on the phone while he was reading…I don’t think he wanted to promise us anything after reviewing the first repair (first worse sentence ever written).

We paid the repair man $70 to tell us that, not only would he not recommend paying $300 to fix it, but it was a fire hazard to even have it be plugged in. What a wonderful thing to hear living in a basement. Our three giant egress windows are easy to climb out of and have an up-to-code-inspected ladder to climb out of too. Two smoke detectors round out our safe living environment.

When you cook bacon without air ventilation the house smells like bacon. I did NOT go to school to figure that out…I know by experience. So I plugged our gastro-pod back in and turned on the fan. After using it for about an hour I heard something. I wish I could say it was a ‘pop’ or a ‘zzzipsh’ or a…well maybe not a ka-BOOM…but something I could describe. I just heard a noise though. And the digital numbers on the microwave went out. It died I think. If it didn’t die then it most certainly did after I unplugged, unscrewed it from the wall, carried it outside, and video-taped my kids hitting it with two-by-fours.

(This is not the forum to mention the brand but it starts with a G and ends with an E and all the reviews are 5/5 stars mentioning that it works great as a not-used-a-lot-second-oven-for-thanksgiving)

(The expression shows all of our sentiments.)

Not so pesto...

2012-02-16T17:13:00.001-08:00

I printed out 5 recipes and bought food for all of them.

The potatoes are ready to be replanted with things growing on them.

The tomatoes, I hope, are not like bread – part of it is bad so the whole thing is.

The Shallot, hopefully, are like tomatoes…for all the same reasons.

And the onions.

I was surprised at how much attention I could put into cooking with another adult around to corral the children. Rest assured that ropes were not used. My wife was more of a sheep dog lightly nipping our children’s heels to move them in their appropriate directions.

Apparently in April 2, 2010, gold was worth $16310.37 per pound. The internet told me that. Pine nuts, currently, are $36 per pound. I don’t know why I’m comparing them. Maybe pine nuts just strike me as expensive so it helps to think of something more expensive. So the internet also told me I can substitute slivered almonds…except when making pesto sauce. Apparently I’m not supposed to make pesto sauce with dried herbs either. I was told I can’t make it that way. So I’m calling it something else. Let me think about it. In any case:

1 clove of garlic

2.5 TBS basil

some grated parmesan (I can’t remember)

olive oil (some?)

salt and pepper

lemon juice (from 1 lemon)

I actually used my mortar and pestle to grind the clove and the basil together. The only other time I use this device is when I’m grinding pills for patients who can’t swallow whole ones. They’re yummy.

Then, I made the pork chops.

1 TBS thyme – it actually calls for a handful ground up…

salt and pepper

1 clove of garlic

lemon juice

1 TBS olive oil

4 pork chops

1 pesto recipe

I brushed the pork chops with the combination of ingredients above, then cooked them 4 minutes on each side. Serve with pesto sauce that’s not actually pesto sauce.

So it was a party in my mouth but my wife said it was more like a dried up party where dry liquor means that there’s no liquor. She asked me what the crunch was (the almonds) and then remembered the astronomical expense for buying gold…pine nuts…whatever. She also said that that’s why you don’t use dried herbs. I didn’t learn the lesson because of the party in my mouth.

Actual pasta

2012-01-29T17:10:00.000-08:00

My wife took two thirds of our children with her today so I headed out,

with the littlest 3^rd to our local supermarket (called Rosauers) to inspect

their prices for a recipe. I’ve been shocked at how far this recipe has

gone and wanted to share not only the recipe but the cost as well.

I should mention that the ‘starting costs’ of cooking inexpensive, good

food is slightly higher so, just for my own sake, I’ve outlined how much

it would cost to start with this recipe and how much it would cost if I

already had things such as olive oil taking up space in my canned soup

shelf.

The kids are learning and exploring. The oldest (who is currently five)

told me the correct amount of change if I only had three and the smoothie

costs only one. He’s a little genius.

The second oldest (who is currently four) has started ballet. She jumps

around until she hurts herself.

For our youngest (who is currently 9 months(ish) ), just a shoe to chew

on is enough for him. It’s boosting his immune system I think…I read

that somewhere I think. That’s what they say anyway. I googled it on

wikipedia. It’s on the back of my pop tart box. Oh the amazing age

we live in.

Olive oil 1/3 cup (79ml)

10-12 cloves of garlic (use a garlic press)

1 large onion (finely chopped)

48 ounces (1420ml) cans crushed tomatoes

1 tsp salt (5ml)

½ tsp freshly ground black pepper (2.5ml)

¼ cup (60ml) basil

1 lb (about ½ kg) spaghetti

For this recipe I added a pound (approximately ½ kg) of browned

hamburger meat but I don’t think I needed to.

Ok so here it goes. This is so easy it’s not even funny (why would it

be funny in the first place?). Remember what I said about prep-work?

Over the next 15 minutes:

-press the garlic and put it in a small bowl (smaller than a bowl…bowlet?)

-measure out the olive oil and put in a small bowl

-chop the onion and put it in a bowl too

-put the salt and pepper in another bowlet

-measure out the basil and put it into a bowlet

-put two medium pans on the stove, one with water for boiling spaghetti

and add a “dash” of olive oil in it

Over the next 5 minutes, I wash everything I just used.

While one kid is shaping up his business plan for smoothies, one of them

is bouncing off the couch and the other is tasting the underside of my

slipper, putting all this together took only 5-10 minutes. After that, let

it simmer to blend all the flavors. Then, console the bonked head, exchange

the slipper for Winnie the Poo, and spell check the business plan.

Heat the olive oil in a medium pan over medium for about 2-3 minutes.

Add the garlic and onion. Stir it for another 2-3 minutes so it doesn’t

burn. Add the tomatoes, salt, and pepper and mix it up. After a few

minutes add the basil. Let it simmer on low for AS LONG AS IT

TAKES to console, exchange, and tickle.

At this point I let it cool down and even stick it in the refrigerator to

heat it up later. The oil in the water for the noodles is simply there to

assist them not to stick if I can’t stand there stirring the whole time.

Olive oil (34 ounces / 1 Liter) – 9.89

Garlic – 0.69

Onion – 0.79

Crushed tomatoes – 2.29/ea

Kosher Salt box – 3.39

Pepper corns (w/ grinder) – 9.99

Basil (0.63oz / 47ml) – 4.79

Spaghetti (48oz / 1.5kg) – 4.29 $38.41 to start…

…so technically since I already had the olive oil, onion, crushed

tomatoes, spaghetti, salt, pepper, and basil, it would cost $0.69

(for the garlic). Sixty-nine cents for 5 meals for 2 adults and 3 kids.

We still have some left over.

Eventually I’ll flesh out a week’s menu and costs associated for a

given amount of adults and kids. Stay tuned (it’ll be a while for that

one).

The beginning of pasta

2012-01-18T10:56:00.000-08:00

It’s always a good idea to have pasta, canned crushed tomatoes, garlic,

olive oil, basil, oregano, thyme, and onions on hand. For Sam, who likes

his spaghetti left alone and Maggie, who likes hers (her’s? hers’? herz’s?)

cut up, I’ve decided to stay away from it. I buy the bow ties…or

anything else that can be scooped up with a spoon. Everybody’s happy.

I also buy the 2-3 pound (0.91-1.36 kg) ground beef. It’s easy to brown

with Sam needing reminders to NOT throw the football hard in the house,

Maggie falling out of her chair while coloring in the kitchen, and Max…

crawling around where he shouldn’t (That toilet looks AWSOME!…Why

hasn’t anyone TOLD me about this!).

In a non-stick pan (my wife continues to remind me of what to do and not

to do with non-stick pans), add 1 tablespoon (14.8 ml) of olive oil, half a

tablespoon of garlic salt (or garlic powder), and the 2-3 pounds of ground

beef. Set the burner to low, cover the pan, and go put the football away,

comfort the 4 year old who wiggles in her seat too much, and take away the

toilet brush from the ankle-biter. I could brown it (the beef, not the ankle-biter)

faster but this way the kids don’t all need their own pack-n-play.

After it’s browned, I put it in a plastic-lid container and try not to forget

to use it before it spoils (no longer than a week).

I’ll come back to the pasta recipe eventually.

I think kids eat what you give them. Back when Maggie was 2, she

would point at what she wants. It was cute. Then when she was 3 she

would say cereal and, of course, point at the sugar cereal. Now she says

“Can I have some sugar cereal?” She knows the cereal she wants and the

word ‘sugar’ coming out of an almost-4-year-old is adorable. If I can

remind myself of how many times I cave to her giggle, it becomes easier to

say “Just Cherrios for now.” My wife, one of the smartest parents I know,

keeps a load of fruit in the kitchen. If they get hungry, they will eat it.

Max is now eating smushed bananas and he loves them. This removes the

necessity of buying baby food.

Eventually I’ll be listing some extremely easy (and hopefully inexpensive)

recipes here. This includes the pasta recipe. The “easy recipes” is much

easier to figure out than the “inexpensive” part because, for example, buying

skinless chicken breasts is more expensive than skin-on chicken. Today (or

tomorrow) I’ll be heading to the store to find out how much the difference

actually is. I should add that, while I actually like Wal Mart and Costco, I’ll

be buying all my products at a more “localish” grocery store because, let’s

face it, local stores are um….local (closer), instead of driving 20 minutes in

a car with three kids to the place where the city zoned for the billion dollar corporation stores.

Then I’ll cook something.

Then I’ll see how far it goes.

It will be primarily a dinner menu.

Eventually I’d like to do the same thing for breakfast and lunch but those

sound easier for some reason.

I’m continually reminded that the economy probably isn’t going to have

an up-swing anytime soon. So cooking from the most basic ingredients is

becoming more important to me.

Also exercise. How do I take care of 3 kids, not be completely exhausted,

and lose weight? Another blog for another time.

kids and naps

2012-01-12T15:16:00.000-08:00

What's the most disrupting thing for food preparation and time
management for a man staying at home with three kids?

The three kids.

I have to work around them. I emphasize the food "preparation"
because it is the most important part of making lunch and dinner.
If you've never checked out Brian Regan, he is a must see for
stand up comedy. Most stand up comedy that I've enjoyed deals
with every-day life events that are funny mostly because of the
delivery of the stand-up comedian. If you've ever watched food
network, you'll notice that they have everything in pre-measured
bowls. Mr. Regan mentions this because when you actually try
and make something in a 30 minute time frame, you'll find that
it takes about 9.5 hours which may or may not include going to
the store the second time. He's right. Food network stars have
a large staff that works very hard to make them look as good as
they are. Don't get me wrong. I like the food network. I can
watch Chopped with my kids (who, I should mention, enjoy playing
Chopped as long as I help them count down from 10 when they're
almost done) all day long and it won't get boring. But anything
on television hits the cutting room floor eventually. 2nd take,
3rd take... So it only takes them 30 minutes to make something
that takes us 2 hours to make IF we've planned appropriately.
So planning is a must.

Getting the kids to take naps can be the hardest part of planning.
Sometimes they're not tired. Sometimes they're so tired that
they never go to sleep. Sound silly? It does but it happens.

I think the only mistake that I've made is believing that what I
did today will work tomorrow. It doesn't always work like this.
Sometimes it does. Sometimes one of them gets into a routine
but honestly, bewteen three kids, one of them will be out of a
routine and I'll have to plan around it (the routine...I don't
call my children 'it').

Well, I take that back. The other mistake I made was telling my
wife what worked.

"Honey. Here's what I do. I sing three renditions of 'Jesus
loves me' and substitue Sam, Maggie, and Max for the pronoun 'me.'
What this does is it allows me not to get ahead of myself in putting
Max down for a nap. After that, I hum a tune I heard in 'Man
From Snowy River' a few times just to make sure he's sleeping.
Then I move my arms a bit so he doesn't feel too settled when I
put him in his crib. Before I put him in his crib, though, I
take my watch off so I can pull my left arm out from behind his
head after putting him in the crib without scratching him. The
process that it takes for me to take my watch off helps 'jostle'
him enough so the motion of placing him in the crib doesn't wake
him up if my arms were completely stable. So try that ok?"

Of course we both do that. Somehow our religion of science and
what works and what doesn't pervades our brains so much that
everything has a reason. Max, of course, can't contribute to this
conversation...which might be a good thing because I'm sure his
commentary would include things like "great bowel movement," "the
quicker I pretend to be asleep, the quicker you quit singing," and
"you haven't changed me in 8 hours."

SO.....

Once the kids are sleeping I try not to sit down to write a blog.
I'll start getting things ready. I use an MP3 player with an
ear piece that hooks over the ear so I can still hear if the
kids get up. I love music. It's like food. So many simple
things evolving into combinations so different every time.

I should add that I don't take a nap. I make coffee. It is a
vice but trying to take a nap while the kids are sleeping is like
choosing the checkout line that is the shortest. The person
in front of you will ALWAYS write a check, will ALWAYS ask for
the date, and will ALWAYS want something put back after the total
has been rung through...and maybe a different brand of milk
brought up from the back of the store. "Override on isle 3."

We've all heard it.

Reasons

2012-01-12T14:42:00.000-08:00

I wrote a blog once about why I was going to start a blog.
Talking about a conversation much in the same way that ESPN
broadcasts 5 guys talking about which broadcast is going
to be the biggest broadcast of the year.

I finally decided that, for me at least, it had to be something
practical.

Selah.

I'm home two days in a row with my kids. Sam, five years
old, Maggie, four this month, and Max, 9 months.

Selah.

With the economy the way it is, I've found that it's much
easier to buy Mcdonalds every day. Then, keeping in mind how
much documentaries are no longer fact-based, watching
documentaries about child obesity and having at least a
rudimentary understanding of good nutrition, I've decided
against Mcdonalds everyday. I grew up in Austria in a little
town (population 300K) called Graz. It was a huge treat to get
to go. Eating out was special. Is it good for my kids to grow
up not always getting what they want even when I have the means
to give it to them? Probably.

Selah.

So let me pull these three things together.

I want to learn to feed my kids (and me and my wife) for less
than it costs to eat out.

I want to learn to cook food that makes my kids not feel like
going out to eat because of the food (but maybe the Play Place).

I want to move away from immediate gratification that pervades
much of this culture. I can't teach my kids about God and the
morals that follow by showing them the latest Veggie Tales any
more than I can rely on the food labels printed by corporations
wanting to sell me more FDA approved products.

Being at home with my kids makes this a challenge as it relates
to time management. Kids don't always take a nap at the same
time. Kids don't always allow me to devote all my attention
to something that is, sometimes, exclusively for them.

Selah.

Time management. 3 kids. Food. Enjoy it. Low income.
In the words of Sam (at 2 years old)...Weady. Det. Do!